Local Town Outlaws the Question: Is the Road Closed?

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Temperance, MN – It’s an experience we can all relate to: you’re trying to get home from a long day’s work and you see the flashing lights and a large sign that says “road closed.” Obviously, you see the sign and can clearly read the sign but after a brief moment of consideration presume that it cannot possibly apply to you. So, filled with confidence in your unique situation you take to informing the officer that “I just live right over there,” only to be sadly disappointed that the road is, in fact, closed.

This familiar scene has played out across the country countless times but after police administration in the town of Temperance had to approve a staggering 1,204 hours of overtime in Q4 of 2018 for officers standing by to re-iterate the contents of the signs placed on the roadway at accidents or other dangerous conditions, they said enough was enough.

City council voted 5-1 in favor of the new ordinance that makes asking a police officer “Is the road closed?” to a civil infraction fine of $150. Chief Tamson told BNN, “We couldn’t be happier with this decision. I can get my officers back to focusing on the task at hand and save valuable dollars in the budget. At one point in November, the traffic backup for those wanting to express to officers why they should be exempt from road closure required us calling in help from the State police to deal with it. Quite frankly, it was embarrassing.”

BNN also spoke to a meager group of about 4 individuals holding signs reading “Your Roads are Communist” who told reporters that they legitimately only know one way home and that being forced to “go another way” was un-American and certainly not what they pay property taxes for. Clive McPherson said, “I literally am paying for a road and a home I cannot get to while apparently police cars and ambulances somehow can magically travel across with no problem. It doesn’t seem fair is all.”

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